First of all sry.. because this will be a very long update.. & may be boring too .. read it in ur own risk.. sry for taking ur precious time.. let’s get in to the story..
At moving train:
Abhi woke up due to sudden jerk of train..& saw pragya who is just admiring him..:) wen he saw her , she immediately closed her eyes & pretends to sleep.. abhi was confused by her act.. but, he is in no mood to think about tat..&he took his mobile & started to re read msg of sweety.. (wenever he felt bored.. he used to re read his old msgs 😉 ) it is some old msg.. msg convo b/n abhi & sweety..
Abhi: oii.. chuweety.. wat r u doing?..
Sweety:looks like some one is out of mood..
Abhi: ya.. nothing interesting .. but, hw do u know tat?
Sweety: I just guessed it.. wenever u r getting bored, then u’ll speak with me..
Abhi: smart gal.. tell me some thing interesting..
Sweety: wat can I say?.. mmm…
Abhi: wat mmm..?..
Sweety: am thinking.. wat to speak..
Abhi: oo.. I see..
Sweety: wat r u doing now?..
Abhi: I said boring & u r more boring now..hmm.. okay tell me about ur someone spcl..
Sweety:y r u asking tat now?.
Abhi: to know… u see.. am boring.. looks like u r also boring.. so speak about ur boy na..!!
Sweety: haan.. I tell u .. then u’ll tease him & me..
Abhi: no yaar.. !! tell me please.. pretty please..?
Sweety: okay.. he is sweet ,cute ,hot & handsome..
Abhi: like me… then..?
Sweety: may be.. he is a gud guy I have ever met..
Abhi: this also like me.. u told me na.. am a gud guy..
Sweety: ya!! & he has his own love.. am not his lady love..
Abhi: man!! This is also like me.. u see wat.. he is such a loser.. don’t feel for him..
Sweety: no.. no.. I don’t want him to be a loser.. I love him.. eventhough he is not love me..i love him.. &I’ll..
Abhi:y r u like this? He is not worth for ur love.. move on from his thoughts..
Sweety: I can’t & I won’t..
Abhi: u have to.. y r u struck in ur past..
Sweety: he is not only my past.. he is my present & future also..
Abhi: u gave lots of advice to mee.. use some of the advices for urself too..
Sweety: we r different ET.. I didn’t confessed my love to him.. even he didn’t knew tat a gal is waiting for his love.. but, in ur case ,u both were in love.. atleast u loved her truly.. & she cheated u… that’s y am telling she is not deserve ur love..
Abhi: tat crack also gone away with his so called love na?. u have to move on.. for me..
Sweety: for u?..
Abhi: I mean to say for u.. for me, for ur parents, for ur frnds & all.. okay am gotta go.. bye .. tak care..
Sweety: bye..tak care..
After re read this old msg convo…ABHI’S POV: (train)
It has been 6 years .. still I don’t know much about this gal.. I don’t know her name.. & I named her sweety.. I don’t want to name my relationship with her.. because am very confused of it.. she cares for me .. she teases me.. she irritates me.. she scolds me.. she loves me..& I do love her.. but, I don’t mean the love tat a boy & gal shares .. now a days love became some type of business where money speaks than our heart.. we r not that kind.. & my sweety is different from other gals.. she is loving a guy& the guy knows nothing about her love.. but, without expecting his love she prays for his happiness.. & she is madly in love with that guy.. I won’t chat with her frequently.. frankly saying I don’t want to chat with her frequently.. because I feel something towards her..if am not wrong.. I hav some unknown feelings for her.. the feelings I don’t want to admit.. but, wen am worried she is the one who cheers me by her words.. I wondered many times how this gal manage to get about my worries without seeing me & speak with me wen I want some one badly by my side to support me.. she, her words of hope , her way of thinking all r different from others.. & I feel relax wenever she is talking to me like she is there for me.. but, I don’t want to broke our relationship by telling these unknown crappy feelings to her.. I can’t tak risk in loosing this relationship..& I know she is in love with a guy wat if she misunderstood me & broke our relationship.. then I will lose my spcl person.. so let it be.. I was thinking about sweety & looked the gal just opposite to me..this gal looks cute while she is sleeping.. abhi.. till now u r thinking about sweety .. now this gal.. not gud abhi.. if this gal is my sweety .. it will be better na.. I will admire her like this..
**end of Abhi’s POV**
Abhi’s mind is oscillating b/n sweety’s sweet voice & pragya’s cue face.. by admiring her he slept.. around 5:30 am pragya woke & saw abhi who is sleeping like a kid.. she took her diary from her shoulder bag & started to write in it..(read it in pragya’s voice)
DEAREST ET, (6.8.2014)
U know wat.. this also one of my best days in my life.. lots of morning I hav dreamt about how I will wake up by seeing ur face.. & today my dream comes true.. am waking up by seeing u.. my love.. only u can stole my heart again & again.. I didn’t know tat u will sit just opposite to me..& u didn’t told me tat u r coming to home.. I know.. am not tat important to u to tell ur schedule.. &also u don’t know tat am in delhi.. whatever am travelling with u.. with my love.. the most lovely train journey ever.. I hope in our life journey , we will travel with eachother.. & am waiting for tat day..
**end of writing diary**
Now pragya startred to read her diary from the first page & reminiscing her ever green past..(guys this diary thing will take some shots because the story lies in this.. so please bear with it& it’s full of abhigya only..!!)
IN THE NAME OF MY LOVE..
1st page in diary: (11.6.2007)
New day.. new school.. my 11th std first day.. wen I was insearch of my class, I saw him .. & asked him for 11th “A”.. he smiled & asked me “am also new to this school.. tell me if u saw 11th “E”?..” I nodded my head in no.. & it was the first tym I had spoken to u guy apart from my family members.. & I have studied in a gal’s school upto 10th std.. being a shy gal I went from there without speaking more to tat guy.. but, his smile.. & his tall figure.. his eyes.. all r started to haunting me.. but then wen I found my class I sat in a place & got some frnds named rachana, sobia& some more..
All set in my class.. & am no more a new student.. I hav some frnds.. they are too crazy too.. & today I saw the guy.. I don’t know his name& am kind of shy to ask his name also.. my frnds r already teasing me tat am a waste gal .. not even looking at guys.. God they are always speaking about guys.. I’m not interested in such things.. but, wat to do… hav to hear all those senseless talks..
Now.. I can say tat I became familiar with my classmates & my new school.. & they are taking 12th subject .. so having some stress over my studies.. & I saw him today while I’m in my school bus & he is waiting for his bus & he is talking to his frnds.. I could not stop myself to ogle him.. I stole glances every now & then .. & he spotted me tat am looking at him.. I pretends to turn & look everywhere but him..
Today my frnds were chatting about some new love birds in our school.. sobia told tat “one 11th E guy is in love with 11th D gal Ria..they both r fair & looks cute.. but, tat guy is more handsome.. I hope he will consider me after their broke up..” I laughed at her antics & it striked my mind.. that 11th E guy may be him na?.. ooh God.. wat can I do.. if it is him.. !! noo… no.. I can’t think like that.. think positive.. he will not tat guy..& I can’t see him frequently because my class is in down floor.. & his class is in first floor..
1st term xams r going on.. & the most satisfying thing is he is in my hall for today’s xams & we r in same bench.. a 10th std a guy sat in between us.. & he is such a naughty boy.. without studying anything asking help from me & him.. I don’t know hw to address tat 11th std guy.. I don’t know his name na.. this 10th std boy sneezing & talking loudly to that mam..(we two r new na.. so, these r new to us..) tat boy told something & the whole hall laughed because of him.. we two smiled at him ..& he looked at me .. & I looked him.. now,it seems like.., we r smiling by seeing each other.. tat tym I decided tat Mr.Smile is his perfect name.. MR.SMILE…
Today Mr.Smile is not in my desk.. he is sitting with another gal as per the roll no.& tat gal is 10th std.. but, I can’t help but stare at them.. & he didn’t even looked at me once.. so sad na!!
Exams finished .. & usual class is going on.. & today I saw Mr.Smile in my bus.. I thought he will come in my bus.. I was turned to see him & he was chatting with his frnds.. & after tat he went out waving bye to his frnds.. & he looked at me.. as always I turned my head & pretends to talk with my frnd..
Today am crying.. because of Mr.Smile.. not exactly crying.. but, little bit hurt.. my princi has arranged a common prayer& all 11th students r there in a hall.. & sobia said “this is Ria’s boy frnd..”she pointed out Mr.Smile.. & sobia showed me Ria too.. she looks pretty.. & definitely they will look cute together.. I was like struck there in tat movement.. & sobia also said his name.. but, now.. I don’t want to know about him.. sobia is an old student in tat school .. so, she has some mates & they will update their gossips to her .. & she will update us.. most of the gossips were rumors.. so, I approached in a positive way.. it can be a rumor…. Hoping for it..
Really busy with studies & all.. & today I read my diary again..& I noticed tat.. I had written diary only about him.. Mr.smile.. there is no day without mentioning him in my diary.. it looks like I’m writing his incidents only.. & I don’t want to write other things also… y!! I don’t know the reason also..
Today am sooo happy.. sobia said tat Mr. Smile is not in love with Ria.. & Ria is the one who told like tat & Mr.Smile had broken his frndsip with her because she took advantage of his frndlyness.. I hope he is single.. I can’t xpress my happiness.. & I don’t know why am happy because of this.. but really verryyyy happiee…
Again exams & I hoped to see Mr.Smile in my hall.. but, unfortunately ,he is another hall for all exams.. I really missed him..
New year .. & I wish I should not be like this & concentrate on my studies.. I took a resolution not to look at him any more.. but, wen I reached school I automatically started to search him & I found him .. he was talking to his frnds &smiled.. while smiling he saw me.. tat was like he smiled by seeing me.. wat a day gal.. I want to go away from him.. but, he is pulling me towards him by his cute smile..
I don’t know.. y am writing this today.. my frnds r committed & they r enjoying this day.. today leave , but.. my thoughts r roaming around Mr.Smile.. I know, I’m not looking gud.. & if I say I love him this will be the biggest wish I can ever wish .. I’m not a perfect for him..he is cute , sweet & hot.. am not..
Finally all xams got over.. feeling relaxed.. but, one thing is I couldn’t see him for 15 days .. as it’s my vacation.. thank God.. it’s only 15 days.. not more than tat..
I saw him after 15 days.. !! happieee…
Uff.. they are talking classes .. without leaving us.. my haed is spinning like a fan.. because of all this chapters.. I relaxed myself wen I see him.. he is my peace..
It’s superb.. we r moving to another block where whole 11th can be in one floor.. oops.. now we r in 12th std na..our block is “L” shaped .. both mine& his classrooms are at middle at both rows(I think u can imagine tat).. we are just diagonally opposite.. now, I can easily see him.. & he have to cross my class to go for his computer lab or whatever may be.. I sat near window ..
Today wen we r talking about same random things the love topic came in between.. as I said.. my all other frnds r committed & I will tease them.. sobia said “in our group all r having their pairs.. somebody have 2 boyfrnds also.. but, one gal is there & escaping from our teasing..” I thought she is trapping me .. so I said”I don’t want any one.. u know na.. I have no interest in all tat..”sobia said ”u don’t want to love him.. & we will use him to tease u.. & am sure u’ll like the person who I have chosen for u..”I said with anger”hw can u say that?i will like him.. I don’t want anyone.. leave it..”
Sobia”then u don’t want ria’s boy frnd..” my eyes popped out & I did a mini dance in my mind because she is choosing the one I want for me.. sobia”prags.. I’m sure.. he is perfect for u.. ur height,weight, skintone,ur character.. all set..” I couldn’t show my happiness& with irritated face”he is not Ria’s boyfrnd na?..”
Sobia”haan.. from now, he is ur boyfrnd.. wat say?..” ”go gals.. u & ur crazy talks..”i said & started to study.. how this gal manage to get the idea of me & him!!! Am I ogling at him like that.. if she had caught me wen I looking at him?..God!! save me na..!!from their stupid talks..
Now a days I like my class test too.. because I can see him often.. I can see him through my window if he is sitting in the corridor bench for exams.. he he.. I can’t write my exams though..!! 😉 wenever he is crossing my class room my frnds will give signal to me.. poor gals, they don’t know am more alert than them.. crazy gals..
It has been 2 days .. he is in off.. usually my princi won’t give us leave.. but, 2 days.. he didn’t came.. I feel somthing bad.. & I could not ask about him to my frnds.. then they will tease me.. now also they are teasing me.. but, they r thinking tat am not interested in him.. if they know tat I’m longing for him, they will tease me more …!!!
Today he came.. & he is not walking properly.. & I saw his legs.. & it was bandaged.. i don’t know why.. wen I saw him in his pain, my eyes filled with tears.. & after sometimes.. sobia told me tat he had a minor accident & tat’s y he is walking like this.. I was like crying.. but, I should not.. then sobia told me tat “u know one thing prags.. ur BF have an younger bro & he is also hot.. I think more than ur BF..”I was like slapping her& saying like”he is cute & hot..watever may be.. he is the only handsome for me..” but, I couldnot tell tat na.. so I remained silent .. & afterall his brother will be cute only.. because he is my Mr.Smile’s brother na?..
Today sobia’s bday & our school’s sports day.. so we planned to go sobia’s home after half a day.. & we went there by out bus & sobia accompanied us.. we had fun in her home.. & while returning we said sobia tat we can manage to go.. she too agreed.. & while waiting for bus Mr.Smile came there in his bike to a shop.. & he noticed us.. & we r in uniform.. I saw a question mark in his face.. may be he was thinking hw these gals r here or these gals or 12th or not.. but, am happiee to see him in his black cotton full hand shirt & he folded it as ¾ th in his sleeve.. he looks too hot wen he is riding the bike & wearing my fav color shirt & tat to 3/4th folded sleeve & his first two buttons of the shirt was remained open.. he is killing me.. & he is looking at us blankly & drove & turning to look at us two to three times & went away.. sobia had told me tat he is also her bus & her area.. but, I didn’t imagine tat I’l saw him there.. & I thought it’s his stop to get the school bus..
Again mid exams.. this time we r in same hall.. means I & my Mr.Smile.. before the xam started.. I’m revising whatever I had studied & with my corner of eyes I have noticed him.. he is chatting with his frnds..he is sitting in a desk and his frnds surrounded him.. they were making noise & I turned & saw them.. not them but him.. he is looking at me like like.. I don’t have any words.. but, tat look.. it’s different .. & I turned my head & started to study.. but, my heart beats are raising high.. then xam started.. in the mid of my exam I turned to look at him.. & he also looked at me.. I don’t know.. is there any wavelength between us.. & I have no courage to look back again..
Days r passing.. & I’m like addicted to see him.. to notice him.. & all.. I could not tak my mind off without thinking about him..
We r instructed to wore our diwali dress today.. only this day they allow us to wear non uniform.. & me & my frnds were chatting .. they were talking about the dresses & sobia asked “tell me gals.. which color should ur Bf will wear this day..if u tell correctly means I will give u the perfect couple award..” they all r chatting & sobia aske me”wat about u?” I said “shut up” sobia”don’t be shy na?.. tell me” I just got irritated & said”black & white..”I know.. for auspicious day they won’t took some black color. But I said “black& white” to my surprise he wore black & white shirt.. & my idiot frnds were grinning to their ear to ear.. God wat I hav done!! Mr. Smile.. why u wore this color.. I asked myself & looked at him.. he was like starring at me.. why the hell now he is starring at me.. among all am the only one who covered my self fully with my anarkali type of chudi.. my frnds said that am like village gal.. & some said neat.. & my mam said tat I like this .. a gal should wear like this.. simple & beautiful…I didn’t expect this various comments anyways .. his looks gave me some peace..
Last day of this year..An unknown fear is growing up.. only 3 months more.. this days will not come again.. I can’t meet him either.. I will miss this school .. I will miss my frnds.. I will miss him.. that hurts me a lot..I don’t know.. wat can I do.. I don’t have the courage to tell my feelings to him & also my frnds..
It is a regular xam.. & only 3 staffs are available.. so they mingled the computer science students with maths bio students.. & in that we came to his class.. there already 2 sat in a bench .. & we have sit in the middle.. wen I came to sit with a gal my another classmate take tat seat.. & I was standing like a statue & mam asked me to sit in the middle of two boys.. & I saw them.. God.. it’s him & his frnd.. he is sat near the wall & no way to go..his frnd sat on the other corner.. & it’s only one hour xam.. I feel so suffocated .. mam said 5 more mins .. tie up ur paper & then write.. & all boys came to the classroom & asking for stapler.. Mr.Smile is a generous person & giving his stapler to all.. all r commenting like… mmm… mmmmmmm.. is this stapler is new one or old one.. I can’t understand whether they r talking about me or tat stapler.. but, one thing I really enjoyed those minutes.. that 60 mins was like my life tym wish.. & I didn’t completed my xam.. but, he was done & he can’t move away.. because I have to stand.. then only he can stand.. his frnds were going from the hall.. & am writing.. writing.. writing… he is patiently waiting for me to complete.. all other boys were laughing at his state.. I was going to tied up my paper with a thread & he gave his stapler to me.. such a sweet heart.. &I nervously stapled it & said “than x ” to him & ran away from there.. he again smiled at me..& then as usual my crazy frnds gone crazy by this incident..
Now practicals are goin on.. this day, we had physics practicals.. & first I had finished it.. & came to my class.. all r busy in their next batch & all.. only 5 or 6 were in our class.. I badly wanted to tell him, wat’s in my heart .. but, I could not..he came after completing his practicals.. & he is alone.. I followed him wherever he goes.. but, I have no courge to face him…
This is the last school day.. & we a have a prayer for our exams.. 10 days leave then public xams.. my frnds where talking snaps in their camera.. I have no mood in all this & watching him silently.. where he is enjoying with his frnds…
We went to school to collect our hall ticket.. & I can’t see him..may be am early.. or late.. I have written a letter for him.. but, I didn’t see him na.. so , me & rachu went his stop & waited for him .. in case he can come there na.. rachu knew about me..& she is not like others.. she is understandable person..we were waited for long tym.. & I couldn’t ask rachu to wait more.. so , we left from there..
Last common exam for us.. next xam will be bio for me & for him it’s computer .. today maths.. I’m under stress.. I know..this is the last day, I can see him.. after tat exam.. I saw him in farthest place.. I could not reach him..& my bus driver calling me using his noisy horn sound.. with tear filled eyes I came… miss u..
I asked for his number.. my rachu’s frnd’s frnd is a common frnd of his frnd.. so, I asked number from rachu.. & she told that she will try her best to get his number..
END OF DIARY READING..
While reading.. she saw abhi & he is waking up.. so she put her diary in her bag & pretends to be act normal.. abhi seeing her nervousness smiled inwardly “wat this gal is doing..!” thought & brushed off his thoughts.. her stopping came & she took her bag & ready to go.. tat time her diary fell from her bag because she didn’t closed the zip properly & train is also shaking na.. now the diary is in middle of the seat gap..both of them didn’t noticed tat.. & pragya saw him one last time & went from there.. as for pragya, wen she reached home she don’t have any time to write diary or read it.. she have to concentrate on her ma’s health ,her little sister& her dadi..
Am stopping here.. I know.. this is more boring na.. but.. I want to show pragya’s feeling.. as of now the diary is in tat seat gap.. will abhi manage to see it & get it.. !! till now, she didn’t mentioned his name in this diary ..hw can abhi find out his sweety.. let’s see.. give ur valuable comments.. forgive for my mistakes too.. than x for reading this.. keep smiling & keep commenting.. tak care .. love u all.. my next update will be after this Sunday.. & I’l try to update “me for u” also…